Becoming a More Captivating Individual
如何成为一个更有趣的人
词汇：考研 | 句法：四级 | 文本：考研
刘立军 供稿
We begin with an intriguing notion: our sense of what we have to share varies greatly depending on who we’re with; some people make us feel uninteresting, while others do not.
我们从一个有趣的观念开始：我们对于自己有什么可以与他人分享，很大程度上取决于我们和谁在一起；有些人让我们觉得无聊，而其他人则不会。
Our judgment of others often hinges on their interestingness. However, we may overlook a critical question: how interesting do we feel around someone else? Why is it that in the presence of certain individuals our minds overflow with anecdotes, yet around others, we feel empty and uninspired?
我们对他人的评价通常取决于他们的有趣程度。然而，我们可能会忽略一个关键问题：我们在别人身边感觉有多有趣？为什么在有些人面前，我们的头脑中充满了轶事，而在其他人面前，我们却感到空虚且毫无灵感？
Why do some inquiries about our recent activities spark an outpouring of thoughts, while similar questions from others leave us grasping for any evidence of our own existence?
为什么有些人对我们最近活动的询问能够激起我们的思绪泉涌，而其他人的类似问题却让我们苦苦寻找证明自己存在的任何线索？
To understand this, we must acknowledge an ability of our subconscious that we might not realize we possess. As we interact, we subconsciously gauge how well our conversation partners are receiving and appreciating our words.
要理解这一点，我们必须承认我们可能没有意识到自己拥有的一种潜意识能力。在与他人互动中，我们会无意识地衡量我们的对话伙伴对我们话语的接收和理解得如何。
Do they seem engaged when we discuss something? How well do they follow along? What portions of our reality can they handle without becoming shocked or overwhelmed, and what complexities within us can they comfortably comprehend without prompting a negative reaction?
当我们讨论事情时，他们看起来是否投入？他们跟进的如何？在不被震惊或压垮的情况下，他们能处理我们现实生活的哪些部分，以及在不引起负面反应的情况下，他们能舒适地理解我们内心的哪些复杂性？
Based on these subtle cues, we form an unconscious judgement about how much of ourselves the other person will understand. The more we perceive they will ‘get’ us, the more we express. Conversely, if we sense they won’t understand much, we instinctively become more reserved.
基于这些微妙的线索，我们形成了一个无意识的判断，即对方对我们的理解程度。我们感觉到他们会越“理解”我们，我们就会表达地越多。相反，如果我们感觉他们不太理解，我们就会本能地变得更加保守。
This also sheds light on how one becomes someone around whom others feel comfortable sharing: by being open-minded and self-reflective.
这也解释了如何成为一个让周围的人乐于分享的人：通过保持开放的心态和自我反思。
However, this isn’t easy. Our minds harbor areas filled with fear, pain, and chaos that we’d prefer to avoid. Yet, a person becomes fascinating by courageously exploring their mind’s darker corners.
然而，这并非易事。我们的内心深处有充满恐惧、痛苦和混乱的区域，这些是我们宁愿回避的。但是，一个人通过勇敢地探索他们心灵的黑暗角落而变得迷人。
By being at peace with their troubles, they create a welcoming space for others’ issues. Where they have journeyed internally, we feel invited to join. Their comfort in self-exploration allows us to feel secure in opening up to them.
通过与自己的麻烦和解，他们为他人的问题创造了一个欢迎的空间。他们已经在内心旅行过的地方，我们感到被邀请加入。他们在自我探索中发现的舒适感使我们在向他们敞开心扉时感到安全。
Thus, the key to being more interesting to others lies in becoming adept explorers of our psyche. By unlocking our minds’ doors, we signal that we are trustworthy confidants for the deeper, rarely shared aspects of someone’s life.
因此，变得更有趣的关键在于成为我们心灵的娴熟探索者。通过敞开心扉，我们向他人发出信号，表明我们是可信赖的知己，可以承载生命深处、稀有分享的方面。
People will eagerly converse with us once we’ve bravely navigated our inner landscapes.
一旦我们勇敢地探索了我们内心世界的风景，人们就会热切地与我们交流。
【词汇】
1. captivating adj. 迷人的；有魅力的；有吸引力的
2. outpouring n. 涌现；喷涌
3. subconscious adj. 下意识的；潜意识的
4. psyche n. 灵魂；心灵
5. trustworthy adj. 值得信任的；可信赖的；可靠的
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