By Liz Ryan

Platitudes get on my nerves. They are cheap and thoughtless answers to complicated problems.

"Honesty is the best policy" is a platitude that especially irks me and anybody else who stops to think about it for two seconds.

Honesty is a great policy in many situations, but it isn't always the best policy.

Sometimes you have to tell a white lie to spare someone's feelings. If your friend sends you a picture of herself after her new haircut and says "Do you like my haircut?" you're not going write back to say "Heck, no!"

You're going to write "Who cares about me — do YOU like it?" or just "Yes!," instead.

That's only polite. The truth is important, but we have to be mindful of people's feelings, also. If we are honest, there are times when we ask other people's opinions and we don't really want to hear the truth from them, either.

And here are five lies you're allowed to tell at work.

1. When someone asks you to honestly critique their presentation at a meeting or another activity that was new for them, tell them "I'm proud of you. You really stepped out there!" even if they did a horrendous job. Don't say "It was painful to watch your presentation" even if it's true!

2. When your manager is frustrated and invites you to throw a co-worker under the bus, don't do it — even if your co-worker is guilty. If Evan was supposed to double-check the report before it went to your VP and Evan forgot to do it and the VP got a report with errors in it, don't say "Evan messed up!" When your boss asks you "Wasn't Evan supposed to check the report?" you can say "I don't remember, but it's okay — I'll check in with Evan and it won't happen again."

3. When you helped your co-worker with their project to such an extreme degree that you basically did the project for them, give them the credit anyway. If your boss asks you "Did you do Sarah's project for her? It has your fingerprints all over it" you can say "She's a fast learner — she'll do it alone next time!"

4. When your co-worker, customer or vendor asks you for your input on a memo, a brochure or anything else they hand you or send you to look at, and the material you're asked to evaluate is horrendous, don't say so. Few people if any can handle the feedback "This is wretched — you need to start over." The same person who is standing next to you waiting anxiously for your feedback is the person who thought this brochure or this memo was the bee's knees  when they designed or approved it. Give them one tiny piece of feedback like "You might try getting more contrast between the background the typeface next time" and let it go.

5. Finally, when your workmate confesses their fears and concerns to you, be gentle. When someone asks you "Was I stupid to tell our supervisor that I might have to reduce my hours in May, if my husband's schedule changes?" don't say "Of course it was stupid — that's six months away!" even if that's how you feel. Say "You know what, we are all living and learning! You probably don't need to mention anything else about your possible schedule change. It may not come to pass. Our supervisor has a lot on his mind — he'll forget about it."

It is easy to forget that even when people ask for advice, what they mostly want and need is reinforcement. They need to hear that they're okay, and they are okay — especially with a friend like you in their corner!