Let me tell you there are some times in life
When you fall down
And you feel like you don't have the strength to get back up
There comes a time when
The blank
The blankness of future is so extreme
to such a black wall of nothingness
Not even of bad things
It's not like there is a cave full of monsters that you are afraid of entering in the future
It is just nothingness
"Le néant" as the french would say here
"La vide", the void, the emptiness
and
It is, just horrible
It is horrible to contemplate, a future-less future
If that isn't too impossible
Um, so you just want to
to step out of it, to step out of the whole race, the whole business
the monstrosity of being alive
overwhelms you
I thought what kind of purpose do I have to live
I mean, do you, are you just here to live to die
I mean is there not a purpose for me? Is there not a purpose in life
I had questions and no answers
and I asked my mom and dad, why did this happen ?
and I asked doctors why did this happen
and they don't know
There are some things in life that are out of your control
that you can't change
and you've got to live with
The choice that we have though is either to give up
or keep on going
The very first thing I want to offer you is empathy
I understand that the feeling is real
this idea that you want to
just do an end
put an end to the entire game
of life
so
beyond my empathy, and my care for you
My heart going out to you
I want to offer you this
That there is a law
There is a law in nature
which is that of seasons, right ?
so
in a winter time it's cold, right ?
freezing f***ing cold in the winter time
especially if you live in, like, the north
and it could be so cold that you are miserable
if a man was so cold and miserable that he decided that
perhaps I should kill myself because this freezing cold misery is not worth living in
someone might offer him
the idea that, or remind him of a law that
dude, this is, you have got may be another six weeks, you've got maybe another eight weeks
and then spring is coming, man
and it is just the way it is
things cycle through, it is just a season
right now I understand it is freezing f***ing cold
and you feel horrible
and you feel pretty bad about the situation
BUT
Hang in there
70% of illnesses on the planet, all kinds, are self created
you are able to generate substantial amount of intense emotions and thoughts
But in the wrong direction
You are generating thoughts and emotions which work against you
not for you
You think it's your right
to throw tantrums
You think it is your right to get angry with people
you think it is your
privilege to be depressed so that you'll get attention from somebody
you keep playing this
one day you will not be able to turn back
How did I get from depressed to who I am today
because I tell you I was depressed
When I was age 8 I used to concentrate on the things I didn't have
I wish I've had arms and legs and I wish I could do this
but what can I do?
You see I have a choice, that's what I want to talk about today, choice
I can either be angry for not having arms and legs or be thankful for my chicken drumstick
You see, I can still do a lot of things. At home I can brush my teeth, comb my hair
Get myself ready in the morning and I'm travelling around the world...it's amazing!
Happiness is a choice.
That is what I want to live my life by
You can't always be happy, listen, I know I'm not crazy
I realise the realism in not being happy
Sometime you have to put up with some crap in your life
But if you are always striving to choose happiness
Everyday you wake up and you say to yourself
You know what...I'm going to choose to not let the outside influences of the world affect my mood
I'm going to be in charge of how I feel because I am going to choose happiness.
I promise you you will live a lot happier life and at least you can try to right?
You just have to set the necessary conditions for health
necessary incentives for health
both for yourself and your children, if you have them
Do not set incentives for sickness
I've felt depressed
I've felt miserable
I've felt at times where it may be better to take my life
But with the wisdom that I have gathered in my 33 short years of life
I've come to realise that it's just a feeling
And in the same way that feeling cold is diminished, the misery of feeling cold is diminished
by the insight that spring will come
is the same feeling that you should acknowledge
the same law that you should acknowledge
that no matter how miserable things are right now
it is just a season, it's going to pass
The thing that keeps one living is a sense of future
that there will be a tomorrow and tomorrow
I've got to do this and the day after I've got to do that
Not that any of these things have a particular
logical purpose or a convincing reason to exist
but they somehow keep one going
In the words of Dorothy Parker a great wit and writer and poet
"you might as well live"